You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Randomize
