I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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