so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Randomize
