Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
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