Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
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