u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Randomize
