no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
