For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize