Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
