I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
