okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
