We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I think a kid would responsible me up
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
