Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Randomize
