if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Randomize
