how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
