i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
