p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize