Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
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