just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
