butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Randomize
