Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
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