I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
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