ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize