Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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