who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
her facebook's as public as her vagina
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Man, jail baloney is awful.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Randomize
