69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
