If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
