Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
