Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.

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(830): View more from Texas

just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao

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(315): View more from New York

my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.

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(913): View more from Kansas

Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..

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(309): View more from Illinois

Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...

(1-918): View more from Oklahoma

there were a lot.

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(719): View more from Colorado

He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"

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(347): View more from New York

That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito

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(423): View more from Tennessee

we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle

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