fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
