She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Randomize
