Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
