I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
