Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
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