i don't like sucking hair
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
