if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Randomize
