So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Randomize
