I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Randomize
