I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize