If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I'm getting married
To pizza
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
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