Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize
