you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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