It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Randomize