he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
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