WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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