So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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