My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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