just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
