Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize