Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
we should paint friendship bongs
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
