dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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